List Of 80+ Best Chuck Norris Jokes 2023

Many people may believe that “Chuck Norris Facts”, are just satirical memes or jokes about the American martial artist and action film star. Chuck Norris jokes first appeared around 2005. They were then picked up by Conan O’Brien, SNL and became an Internet meme.

Chuck Norris, a man of superhuman strength and abilities, is capable of feats that are unimaginable for mortals.

This article is an encyclopedia of information that can help you to survive your encounter with Legend-Man.

But I wouldn’t bet on it. Chuck Norris will only let you walk away with your life intact if he wants it.

82 Chuck Norris Jokes – Real Life Facts And True Stories

The abyss looks away nervously when Chuck Norris stares at it.

Chuck Norris’ roundhouse kick can be seen by anyone from outer space.

Chuck Norris told his father, “You are the man of the home now” when he went to college.

COVID-19 is desperate to develop a vaccine against Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn’t light up a room when he enters it, but he does turn off the darkness.

When Chuck Norris is struck by lightning, the sky becomes scarred.

Santa Claus was real before he forgot to give Chuck Norris a present.

Chuck Norris can kill seven people with a single blow. Chuck Norris can kill seven people with one blow.

Chuck Norris, is the man who is responsible for Waldo’s hiding place.

Chuck Norris’ breakfast is Champions.

Ozzy Osbourne bit the bat’s head once. Chuck Norris responded by biting the head off Batman.

Chuck Norris took LSD to make his hallucinations worse.

Chuck Norris dislikes ties. Chuck Norris prefers to win!

Chuck Norris uses pepper spray to season the meat.

Chuck Norris Jengas with Stonehenge.

The teacher had to raise his hands to speak to Chuck Norris.

List Of 80+ Best Chuck Norris Jokes

 

— The 19th Chuck Norris Joke

Chuck Norris kicked a pony in the chin. The descendants of the horse are now called giraffes.

Death had an experience that was very close to Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris punched the wind to create tornadoes.

Ghosts tell Chuck Norris tales around the campfire.

Chuck Norris stepping on a Lego causes it to cry.

Chuck Norris is pushing the Earth downward when he does a Pushup.

Chuck Norris’ “Roundhouse Kick” was named after the time he kicked a house.

Chuck Norris kicked the universe into existence with a roundhouse kick. The Big Bang was the name given to it.

Scientists believe that our Universe is expanding constantly. It’s Chuck Norris running away.

Chuck Norris’ Hawaiian vacation home is located on a volcanic mountain, because who doesn’t enjoy a jacuzzi in the middle of a volcano?

Freddy Krueger’s nightmares involve Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris did not swim in the Dead Sea.

When Chuck Norris tips a waiter, he falls over.

After Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac, Burger King created the slogan “Have It Your Way”.

Chuck Norris tells the story of Morgan Freeman.

Chuck Norris goes to bed to rest the Earth.

Some people have a larger left testicle than a right one. Chuck Norris has two larger testicles than the other.

The Chuck Norris’ Sneeze is the name of the seismic scale, which has a maximum magnitude over 9.

When Chuck Norris visits Rome, the Romans follow Chuck Norris’s example.

After Chuck Norris visits the gym, it is time for repairs.

When Chuck Norris is unable to go to the gym, Chuck Norris goes shopping lifting.

Chuck Norris would beat his shadow to death because it was so close. It is now 30 feet away.

Chuck Norris doesn’t need to flush the toilet. He scares it to death.

Chuck Norris hit a large rock with his golf club. Now we call it the Moon.

Chuck Norris Knives are used by the Swiss Army.

List Of 80+ Best Chuck Norris Jokes

— 46th Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris’ birth was a happy occasion for everyone except the doctor. Never slap Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

Chuck Norris’ sandwich dangles in the air when he drops it.

Chuck Norris has the fastest way to win a man’s love.

Chuck Norris can dribble the bowling ball.

When Chuck Norris’ parents would have nightmares, they would go to his room.

Chuck Norris believes, therefore the World exists.

The granite was too soft for Chuck Norris’ beard.

Chuck Norris punched some people so hard, that their blood began to bleed.

Chuck Norris drinks a beer bottle.

Chuck Norris does not wear a wristwatch. He decides the time.

Chuck Norris presents his wife with a heart that is still beating every Valentine’s Day.

Chuck Norris can get a pregnant woman by pointing her at and saying, “Booyah!”

Chuck Norris’ heartbeat is similar to the US National Anthem.

Chuck Norris’s cowboy boots were made by real cowboys.

Chuck Norris does not use sanitisers. He simply contracts his muscles, and the germs fall off.

Some kids pee in the snow. Chuck Norris has peed his name in concrete.

— 64th Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris can kill two stones by using just one bird.

Chuck Norris drinks coffee instead of nails in the morning.

Chuck Norris’ Monopoly game has a real impact on the global economy.

Chuck Norris tears can cure cancer. It’s a shame he never cried.

Chuck Norris does not breathe air. He breathes fear.

Chuck Norris is aware of Victoria’s Secret.

Chuck Norris cracks the chicken open to get an egg when he needs one.

Chuck Norris visited the Virgin Islands once. The Virgin Islands are now called The Islands.

Chuck Norris is not a street name because nobody would cross Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris mines Bitcoin with a pen and a piece of paper.

Chuck Norris can beat Tetris within 5 seconds. He doesn’t need to play.

Chuck Norris uses the Crane Kung Fu Style to lift a large building.

It is impossible to imagine a hurricane called Chuck, as it would have wiped out everything.

Chuck Norris kicked someone in the roundhouse so hard, their ancestors could feel it.

Chuck Norris can strangle you using a cordless telephone.

Chuck Norris does not turn on the shower. He stares until the shower starts crying.

Chuck Norris’ trash will not be thrown out.

Chuck Norris consumes coconuts with the shell intact.

Chuck Norris won the starting competition against the sun.

Chuck Norris is a bullet-eating breakfast. You’d better not be there when Chuck Norris burps.

Global warming does not exist. Chuck Norris felt cold so he turned the sun up.

Chuck Norris charges a phone by rubbing the device against his beard.