As humans, we all crave companionship. From the moment we are born, we begin to build relationships. We build bonds with our families, seek out friends to connect and grow with, and many of us ultimately find a companion to build and share our lives with. But the truth is, relationships are not always easy. Relationships can be some of the hardest and most rewarding parts of our lives, all at the same time. We all have our own agendas, beliefs, desires, and needs. And no matter how much we love another person; we don’t always see eye to eye.
Have you fallen into a hard spot with one of your loved ones? Perhaps you and your partner have come to a disagreement about something small, like which rug to choose for your new living room. Or maybe it’s something big, like whether or not to have children. Whether it’s a spat with a best friend or an all-out brawl with a parent, conflict in relationships can be extremely hard and even lead to devastation.
If you’re in a conflict with a loved one, we’re here with good news! Conflict doesn’t have to mean the end of your relationship. In fact, working through conflict can make a relationship stronger than ever before! Here are our 4 favorite tips for solving conflict in your relationship.
Tip #1 for Solving Conflict in Your Relationship: First, Listen
- 1 Tip #1 for Solving Conflict in Your Relationship: First, Listen
- 2 Tip #2 for Solving Conflict in Your Relationship: Use “I” Statements, Not You
- 3 Tip #3 for Solving Conflict in Your Relationship: Remember to Keep Your Temper in Check
- 4 Tip #4 for Solving Conflict in Your Relationship: Learn to Compromise
We all have our own perspectives and points of view. That’s what makes humans the diverse and unique people that we are! Oftentimes, conflict derives from differences in two people’s points of view, and either an inability or a refusal to see the other’s perspective.
That’s why our first tip for solving conflict in your relationship is to stop and listen to the other person’s point of view. Take time to understand where it is,they’re coming from and how they’re seeing the situation. Let them explain themselves fully before interjecting your own beliefs and opinions into the conversation. Also, don’t only listen, but think about what they’re saying. Try to understand the situation from their perspective. How would you feel if you were in their shoes? Take time to communicate your perspective, too, once they’re done. Once you’ve both shared your perspectives, you’ll be able to see the differences, and that will help you get to the root of the problem.
Tip #2 for Solving Conflict in Your Relationship: Use “I” Statements, Not You
This is a classic relationship therapist’s tip. One of the biggest mistakes couples make when addressing conflict is to blame the other person. You may be compelled to point out what they did wrong; “You didn’t listen when I told you I wanted to leave the party.” Instead of pointing to their actions, share your experience with them. “I felt ignored when I told you that I wanted to leave the party and you refused”. Blame won’t get you anywhere in conflict; feelings and ownership will.
Tip #3 for Solving Conflict in Your Relationship: Remember to Keep Your Temper in Check
Just like blame won’t get you anywhere, excessive anger won’t, either. Do what’s necessary to keep your anger in check. If you need to take a breath of fresh air, ask for that. You can also try tactics to help calm you down, like drinking a glass of water. You can even utilize calming supplements, like Ashwagandha or CBD (we think these are the best CBD gummies 2020). Anger begets anger, and no one responds positively when they feel like they’re being attacked. Remember that keeping a calm demeanor is tantamount to your success in conflict resolution.
Tip #4 for Solving Conflict in Your Relationship: Learn to Compromise
When it comes to resolving your conflicts, learning to compromise is key to your success. As we mentioned, we all have our own desires, needs, and beliefs. It’s simply impossible to agree 100% of the time. While you may hope to convince the other party to totally give in to your desires, it’s important to recognize that that’s unlikely to happen. Instead, get comfortable with finding a middle ground in your conflicts. Decide what you’re willing to sacrifice for the sake of maintaining your relationships. Encourage your partner to do the same. You may find that it’s easier than you think!